This one is difficult. If it were easy to explore our blindspots, they wouldn’t be blindspots.
Nevertheless, recognizing the hidden patterns of thought and behavior that quietly disrupt our lives and relationships can be profoundly transformative.
Some of you may already feel misunderstood or misinterpreted often. Others might only experience this with certain people and assume it’s their blindspots causing the problem. Even if that’s true, initiating a conversation about blindspots with the people you love can lead to powerful insights.
A word of caution: Only start this conversation if you’re genuinely ready to examine yourself too. It requires compassion for others and self-compassion, so ensure everyone is in the right mindset. Then, go first by saying something like:
"Is there a blindspot—a pattern of thought or behavior I’m not aware of—that you think would improve my life if I explored it? If so, could you describe it as compassionately as possible and help me understand how it looks from your perspective?"
Examples of common blindspots:
Not standing up for yourself or over-accommodating certain people
Treating one person in the family differently than others
Being overly defensive about specific topics
Saying you value something (like family) but prioritizing other things (like work)
Underestimating how your negative self-talk impacts others
Engaging only in conversations about topics you’re comfortable with
Dominating conversations
Letting strong beliefs block you from considering other perspectives
These conversations aren’t easy. The key to success is avoiding a judgmental tone and approaching the exchange with openness and empathy.
Why engage in something so uncomfortable? Because blindspots create disconnection, resentment, and misunderstandings—they’re barriers to the closeness we crave.
So, take your relationships and your life to the next level by bravely exploring your blindspots. The payoff will be worth it.